Evening

And so the sun is slowly, quietly setting. It's Not raining anymore. My day hasn't finished, though, and my feet and ankles hurt and are bruised by too much walking. The golden sunset light makes me thoughtful and a little gloomy, maybe bitter. It's been quite a hard day: I woke up at half past five or so, had a chat, then studied like no tomorrow -maybe lost the data also, but nevermind-, then hospital to meet my dear aunt-mother, then university, and then again hospital -going there now actually. Then maybe a bite home, then rehearsals, and then, finally, SLEEP. Seems quite a deadly day. But I don't mind. I am on leave from work, and I am astonished by how better I feel every day. I have enough energy to do all this, and even more. I am very glad to be busy this way, actually. It just scares me to realize  how much health and time my job cost me. I haven't worked for almost two weeks now, and I feel every day better and better. Can't say things are perfect, but I feel a tiny bit optimistic. Freakin' scared, also, by the choices I could take. Yet, I know that I must focus on myself, without wasting a single second.
I just wish I had more "fixed" points, more certainties. I have myself only. Oh what the hell, this is more than enough!

The sun has dropped, and the sky is deep-blue now, the typical beautiful infinite after-rain deep blue. Damn, I haven't got my camera with me.... Nevermind.
I could spend hours, lost in this sky. There, I am sure, I would find some inner peace.

F.u.c.k.

Well, let's just say that my hormones are quite going crazy today.
Damn xD

Feeling in the rain (unfinished)

Rain falling like teardrops from the sky
One could think that angels cry
For all these lives fading away

I take them one by one on my face
Cold and piercing like an arrow's point
Wishing them to
quench this burning hell inside

Or simply freeze my consciousness
I never wanted to know
I didn't ask to understand
Nor to have a heart


One by one we end up all alone
Rotting into our true mother's womb
Leaving memories and our tomb

I see zombies endlessly wasting time
Hurting others 'till the day they die
Using and abusing them, never satisfied


Oh please, just kill my perceptions
I don't want, I never wanted to see
I didn't ask to realize
Somebody stop my brain.

What is, and what should never be.

Woman
If you hurt a man, if you rape his heart,
If you manipulate his inner feelings,
If you ignore him, if you step on him,
If you use him, if you lie to him,
You're not emancipated, you're not cool
You're just a bitch.

Man
If you hurt a woman, cheat on her, use her as a housekeeper, lie to her, give her for granted, don't listen to her needs, and ultimately beat her, having no arguments to answer to her questions,

Well, man, you're not cool, you're not a Macho Man.  You're a criminal. And a loser.

Time After Time

No matter how hard
No matter how long
No matter if right
No matter if wrong

Whether you survive
Your head keeping straight
Or you're defeated
And you have to bend,

Each single day
Always comes to an end.

Lux

It's me and myself again
Walking on a thread above this loneliness
Oh yeah

It's me and myself again
Thinking and re-thinking 'bout the words you said
Oh yeah

And while my brain tries
To justify it all
The facts are all shouting
That I should be off

I think I'll take time
To think it over

It's me and myself again
Tangled in a lesson that I never learn

I wonder, while the sky turns grey
I sit and pray
That my choices won't lead me to my own dismay

Now you come back and you dare to ask
Why not to cry I have to put on a mask

Why don't you take time
To think it over

I tried to listen to your reasons, none was enough
Now you're telling me that i have to be tough?

Guess there's no reason
to think it over
anymore
Think it over
anymore
Think it over
anymore

Higher

A room, a lonely table,
I sit down
And fill my stomach while the snow
Keeps falling
Covering the roads
In shiny white
'Till the glittering sun
Will blind me
Then I'll fly away
To unknown places
Above the sky
Away from time
No longer hindered by this body
No longer feeling pain
From my heart

I see the covered rooftops,
And then the hills,
Until I'm way above
The mountaintops
Wandering like a cloud
And I don't know
Where the wind will care to bring me.